Sunday, August 1, 2010


After taking so much time off of not writing, not really using the internet, and not really being around anything..internet, or even Justin related. I feel as though I don’t know how to write.

I know what I need to write though. It has always been my outlet. It has always been my way to get everything off my chest..I will be getting rid of the “The Hollands”, and really does pain me. Because, I have built this blog into so much more than I ever thought it could be. I thought of making in private, but what is the point of being The Hollands, if I am just Shelby Holland plus three dogs? There is no “the” if I am not married to him..if I am not his wife.

Then..I talk to him. He tells me how he is making a mistake. That he loves me. He tells me, that I am making a mistake leaving. He says that I didn’t try, and that when he wanted to talk more about being able to work things, I wouldn’t. I begged. I pleaded to talk things out... I do not know what to do.

I have been talking to a guy, S. He is amazing. Such a nice guy, always sweet, and friendly, everything that Justin hasn’t been to me in months. He knows what I am going through, he knows the feelings I am going through, as he is going through something similar. He is such a breath of fresh air.

J wants to come home.

uhh..someone please kick me.

Until I know more;

The girl that needs a shot. <3

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