Tomorrow; J and I are going to counseling. I know that most will not agree with my decisions to give my marriage every last ounce of myself..and try my hardest to make it work. And I am okay with that. I am strong and beautiful..but I am not ready to walk away. I am not ready to accept defeat.
Yes..my marriage is hard. Harder than I ever expected. But I love being married. I love being J's wife, and waking up next to him. I know that there are going to be hard times to come. I don't know where J and I will be six months from now..or even a month from now. But if he and I do end up calling it quits and getting a divorce..then we will both be doing so with the understanding that we gave it our all.
I have always been the person that when things got tough, I dropped everything and left. With J I don't leave.. I get mad, upset, hurt, and so many other things, but I don't ever just drop him and leave it all behind. I have made a life with him. He is my husband.
without trust there is nothing that will make a marriage work. Love is the easy part of any relationship.
ReplyDeleteCounseling is a great idea for you. But I would seriously reconsider and have you move on. Your H is unemployed and doesn't have any goals to drive him. How long are you doing to want to work long hours to provide for him and yourself? How long are you willing to put up with the lies your H told you?
You have a long and bumpy road ahead to make some serious decisions about your relationship. All anyone can do is give you advice, it's up to you to decide the rest. Good luck.